“Desk Rage” is More Common in the Workplace

By Barbara Bartlein

As any human resource executive can tell you, frustration and office temper tantrums by employees are not unusual, but two new studies indicate that incivilities in the workplace appear to be increasing. Termed “desk rage,” by one survey, it includes arguments between employees, pen throwing managers, and workers kicking expensive computer equipment in fits of aggravation.

In a telephone survey commissioned by Integra Realty Resources, Inc., nearly one-third of 1,305 workers who responded admitted to yelling at someone in the office, and 65% said workplace stress is at least occasionally a problem for them. Work stress had driven 23% of the respondents to tears, and 34% blamed their jobs for a loss of sleep.

In a separate study published in the quarterly journal Organizational Dynamics, it was found that workers who experienced rude behavior at work had reactions that were negative for business. Nearly one-third of them admitted intentionally decreasing their commitment to the company, with a quarter indicating that they stopped doing their best. Almost 12% of the rudeness recipients quit their jobs to search for friendlier environments.

Workplace stress is not new, but many experts and workers feel that it is at epidemic levels. Several economic and social trends have escalated tensions or at least made employees more sensitized to stress. Years of layoffs and downsizing have left a lingering sense of job insecurity for many workers while demands for productivity have increased.

At the same time, the nature of the American workforce has changed. It is more diverse, includes more women, and multiple generations, which can exacerbate on-the-job tensions. There is a sense that the technology that was suppose to make jobs easier, from cell phones to emails, have turned into high-tech leases. Referred to as “technology tethers” by C. Leslie Charles in her book, ‘Why Is Everyone So Cranky?” she feels American workers are overwhelmed, overworked, overscheduled, and overspent.

“We’re leading these non-stop lives, and we’re continuing to accelerate the pace,” according to Charles. “We are so preoccupied with what we’re doing and what’s next, that we have an inability to process what’s just happened or what’s bugging us.”

Charles recommends the following tools to de-stress your work life:

• Fortify your “emotional immune system (EIS)” When exposed to “crankiness," stop and quantify the problem and put it in perspective. Is this a small, medium, or large annoyance? Or something more serious? How large of a response is required? Make your reaction match the size of the problem.
  
  
• Take a “Reality Bite." Expecting, waiting, and hoping for things to be different in our lives only increases our susceptibility for crankiness. Expect some parts of life to be frustrating; you will wait in lines that are too long, people will do things that irritate you, and you will encounter inconvenience more days than not. Accept this reality. Let it roll off your back and smile. It may not change what is happening, but you will feel better.
  
  
• Take time out for a Personal Battery Recharge. What do you really enjoy doing? When was the last time you did it? Take the time to recharge. Whether a game of golf, a walk with your spouse, or reading a book take the time for renewal as often as possible. How is the health of your relationship? Take my free quiz at www.WhyDidIMarryYouAnyway.com.
  

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Barbara Bartlein is the PeoplePro™. She helps businesses sell more goods and services by developing people. She can be reached at 888-747-9953, by email at: barb@barbbartlein.com or visit her Web site at www.ThePeoplePro.com.

Published in Networking Today, October 2003.

Four Networking Maxims

By Karen Susman

Networking Maxim #1:

The more times you interact with someone, the greater the mutual understanding and cooperation likely to develop. Meeting someone once doesn't make for a relationship. Follow up and keep in touch often. It's never too late to reignite a relationship.

To Do:

• Contact or re-contact three people you met within the last month.

• Contact three people you haven't talked to in the last year. Always determine the next step, the next contact, so the relationship will continue.
  

Networking Maxim # 2:

Most people prefer to interact with people like themselves. Break out of your comfort zone. The aging hippie may be a retired mogul. Force yourself to go to meetings, classes, and events that are out of your usual realm. Speak to strangers.

To Do:

1. Walk up to an imperfect stranger at an event and start a conversation.
   
2. Attend a trade show that is not in your field.
   

Networking Maxim #3:

Diversify your contacts to reduce overlap and increase leveraging. If your sphere of contacts includes only your high school and college buddies, chances are you all know the same people. But, if you ask, "Whom do you know who...?" of your T'ai Chi master, librarian, and new neighbour from Sheboygan, the answers will probably be non-overlapping and fresh names.

To Do:

1. Review your contacts and build on the diverse relationships.
2. Ask people who are in the fringes of your Rolodex for help, information, contacts, etc. Uncover the gold you've overlooked
   

Networking Maxim #4:

Relationships develop according to your expectations. No one-night stands! If you meet someone and immediately decide there is no future value in the relationship, you will treat that person differently than if you think he or she represents the opportunity of a lifetime. So, approach each person you meet as if that person had great promise. Then you won't have to change your tone or tune, should you discover the relationship has potential.

To Do:

1. Practice deferring judgment and treating each person with respect. You never know.

Karen Susman is a Speaker, Trainer, Coach, and Author of 102 Top Dog Networking Secrets. Karen works with organizations that want to maximize performance. Programs include Humour at Work; Balance In Life; Networking Skills; Presentation Skills; and Building Community Involvement. Order new guidebooks on humour, networking, time management, and community involvement by calling 1-888-678-8818 or e-mail Karen@KarenSusman.com.. www.KarenSusman.com. Published in Networking Today, October, 2003.

The 6 Cardinal Rules of Customer Service

By Nancy Friedman

International Customer Service Week begins October 6th. And that’s good. However, we at Telephone Doctor like to celebrate Customer Service all year long. 24/7/365.

But if you’re asking yourself..." What can we do for our customers during Customer Service Week?" here’s the Telephone Doctor 6 Cardinal Rules of Customer Service. Any one of these tips will enhance your customer service reputation.

1. People Before Paperwork
   
   How many times have you stood and waited while someone tallied up a batch of figures or counted a pile of money? Then, only after they were done were you asked: "Now, how can I help you?" And how many times have you waited while someone "fiddled" with something or wrote up a note, before they acknowledged you? Paper can wait...People should not. Paper won’t walk away, but the customer might. Drop what you’re doing and pay immediate attention to the customer.
   
   
2. Don’t be too busy to be nice.
   
   In most interviews, managers and owners hear something like this from the applicant: "I love to be busy. If I’m not busy I get bored and unhappy." Then we hire them, and one of the first things we hear is the complaint: "WOW, I am sooooo busy." Well, being busy does not give you carte blanche to be rude. Let’s not be too busy to be nice. It’s not worth it.
   
   
3. Rushing threatens customers.
   
   Whether it’s on the phone or in person, avoid rushing people. Make each experience a great one. And remember, one word answers make you sound cold and unfriendly. Slow down. Smell the roses. Stop rushing people. It threatens them.
   
   
4. Don’t use military language on civilians.
   
   Simply put, company jargon should stay within your company. Mistakes and miscommunications thrive on company jargon. You’ll be far more familiar and comfortable with the terms and abbreviations than your customer will. Some companies seem to have words and abbreviations that would make the CIA green with envy. Use simple, easy to understand words to the customer. They’ll appreciate your thoughtfulness.
   
   
5. Be friendly BEFORE you know who it is.
   
   Have you ever been a customer and been treated in a rather average – maybe even below average – manner? And when they realized you were a friend of the boss or someone other than an "average" customer, they brightened up? Why wait to be friendly? Why discriminate? If you’re friendly before you know who it is, you’ll make a whole lot of extra good points. When you’re friendly before you know who it is, you’re delivering the same great service to everyone. That’s the way it should be. Don’t discriminate.
   
   
6. "There ya go" is not "Thank you." "Uh huh" is not "You're welcome."
   
   Count – starting today – just for one day...how many times people forget to say "thank you" and "you’re welcome" to you. "There ya go" just doesn’t hack it. When customers spend money...they want to hear a big smiling "THANK YOU, WE APPRECIATE YOUR BUSINESS." And when we, as customers say, "Thank you"...we don’t want to be grunted at with the old, "uh-huh." Speak clearly. "You’re welcome" is a wonderful phrase. Please use it more often. And don’t be a grunter. When your customers tell you, "Thank you"...give a great big smiling "You’re welcome" right back at them.

Click here to preview online clips from America's favourite customer service video training library.

Nancy Friedman is president of Telephone Doctor®, an international training company headquartered in St. Louis, MO specializing in customer service and telephone skills. She is a KEYNOTE speaker at association conferences and corporate gatherings and is the author of four best selling books. Visit the website at www.telephonedoctor.com or call 314‑291‑1012 for more information.

Published in Networking Today, October 2003.